Monday, July 29, 2013

Coming out of hiding


I'm returning to the real world next week. Can't hide any longer. Time to shoulder another title: Working Mom. I'm trying really hard to appreciate and be grateful for the uninterrupted time I've had with Luca. With all my heart, I do and I am. But I'm human and predictably greedy. Sure, I can see how I might be making this a tad dramatic and I guess I'll concede as much. But to me, this IS a dramatic moment in my life. The most dramatic in fact (aside from when I was born). Becoming a mama has been...everything. I think I suspected as much would happen before Luca arrived. I had vague concepts of maintaining my identity, finishing projects, starting new projects, being an independent mom-on-the-go with baby in tow, etc., etc. Ha. Double ha. What I did not expect was how much I would WANT all of that other stuff to go away. Not healthy, right? Also, I don't really care? Which is in itself a revelation.

Regardless of what I want, life continues and so onward.


Maternity leave happenings and revelations since in no particular order:
  • Priorities have shifted, obviously. 
  • I thought I would have all this time for projects during maternity leave. Boy was I mistaken. I don't think I got a thing done. Scrap books, nearly finished blog posts, closets and cabinets in dire need of organization, curtains that need washing...sigh. To be fair, Luca did arrive 5 days early. (Hey, a lot can get done in 5 days!)
  • I'm now at the same weight as I was pre-pregnancy. I'm very lucky, I know! I know! But things don't all "hang" the same as before. My body is definitely different. Trust. 
  • My hairline has receded. What?!? 
  • I have "mommy wrist" or "mommy thumb". And it Hurts. Like. Hell. It's a sharp, stabby, burning kind of pain. (It's a type of tendinitis.)  
  • My baby takes 100% attention when he's awake. 
  • My baby doesn't nap as often or as long as I expected. 
  •  My baby began sleeping through the night much earlier than I expected and therefore, I get much more sleep than many new parents out there. I'm very lucky, I know! 
  • I ache all over all the time. 
  • We haven't gone to the beach once yet this Summer.
  • We haven't used the backyard once yet this Summer. 
  • Although she was extremely happy when Luca was born, my mom was not exactly the doting grandma like I thought she would be. She barely came around! But she has warmed up, thankfully. Some of this was probably due to some miscommunication on both our parts.
  • The mind shift to becoming new parents has been easy. 
  • Breastfeeding is easy now. But I'm still not comfortable doing it in public.
  • I'm so grateful for having Sergio alongside me in this journey. He has been able to hang out with me and the baby for much more than I thought he would be able.
  • Sergio and I are parenting equals. He is better at some things than I and vice-versa. 
I'm going to miss long lazy days of hanging with these two so much.



  1. Enjoy your last few days at home!! I hope they are wonderful and that your transition back to work isn't too painful :) Also whenever I have a baby I'm going to you for advice!

    1. Thanks Callie! Aw, I'm ready to help whenever you need it!

  2. This last picture makes him look like one of those babies on those Chinese soap operas! OMG, he's so cute!

    1. thanks sis! i think he's a cutie.

  3. We haven't gone to the beach yet either! Maybe we can double date soon. Looking forward to seeing you on Monday :)